This Is Why Men Don't Know What They Want

Most men cannot honestly answer a basic question: what do I actually want? If you take away the constant race for money, the responsibility to achieve, the need to be a support for loved ones, and imagine that there is stability, less anxiety, less tension, what is left then? And very often there is no answer, just emptiness. Because from childhood a man learns not to listen to himself; he is taught to cope, to be strong, to help, to endure. Living by your own desires is not a priority. Sometimes they don't exist at all. When external stress suddenly disappears, it doesn't get easier, it gets more anxiety-provoking, because it is unclear how to live without this constant pressure. Who are you if you don't have to carry, prove, and survive? That is why many men, when everything in life finally falls into place, create problems for themselves, simply because they don't know any other way. Survival is the only familiar mode. In it everything is clear: there is a task, there is tension, there is a sense of being needed, but living calmly, enjoying yourself, doing something for yourself — no one taught that. Figuring out your own desires is a difficult and unfamiliar process. There is often a lot of anger, shame, and confusion there, but that is the first step. A very honest and often very therapeutic one. And without it there is only running in circles.